What is love if not happiness?

I was told that happiness is not what we feel on the inside, but rather what others can see from the outside. The more I hear this the more I feel it to be true. Think about it, if someone is happy they show this sparkle in their eyes, a brightness in their smile, and can’t contain their cheerful movement of dimples, lips, and the curves in their cheeks that others can obviously see. This idea of happiness moves me to believe that we can not only read if someone is happy, but if they are happy in a relationship as well.

How many people out there stay in an unhappy relationship because of money, children, fear of being alone, and whatever else there may be? I’d really like to know this, but my guess is there’s quite a few. I bring this up because it breaks my heart to know that others out there may never be truly happy in their life because of an unhappy relationship that ultimately takes over their entire life.

I’m one of the lucky ones as most would say. I found the love of my life in high school when he was in college and I was just finishing my senior year and going on to college myself. We’ve been together for over five amazing years. But, what about the other, less lucky individuals? How did they get to that point of being in an unhappy relationship and how do we fix it?

To fix what should be mended, we need to stop looking at the relationship itself and rather look at the individual or what the individual is bringing to that relationship. Are they bringing happiness? Meaning, are they in love? Happiness is supposed to come naturally, we cannot force it and we most certainly can see when one is faking happiness, at least some of us can see it, I being one of them. It frustrates me to see individuals fake this happiness and pretend their relationship is “happy.” Why keep lying? Is  it so hard to just say, “I’m not happy.”

I believe that everyone has a soul mate. Whether that soul mate is still with them, in heaven, or miles apart with a signed divorce paper. Soul mates are forever connected and nothing can break them apart, not even a piece of paper. Somethings are unfortunate, like divorce, but what’s worse is lying to yourself and pretending you’re happy. What’s so scary about being alone? Why are people so afraid to be alone when it’s probably the most wonderful thing to experience at some point. To know what love is, to lose it, and then to be alone. Alone. When we are alone we have time to think about what it’s like to be with someone. We have time to think about whether we were happy and if others could see it. It’s not scary, and sometimes it’s necessary.

Maybe I’m seeing love through rose-colored glasses. Maybe I’m creating love to be something worth living. Happiness is worth living for. I believe in non-stop searching. Searching hopelessly for the one, your soul mate. So, what is love if not happiness? Is it really a battlefield filled with emotions? Where you find yourself laughing and crying because you found the one. Is it crying because you don’t know how to live without the other person? Is love also sad because it shows true feelings? I say love is all of the above. Love is writings in the sand. One moment it’s here, and it’s only a matter of time before it’s washed away into the water where it dissolves forever, and only the memory, the soul lives on…


Published by Heather Blynn

Lover of Nature & Beauty. Positive Psychology. Strong believer in healthy living including plant-based, plastic-free, organic, and no animal-testing. If I can help even one person see the benefits of using safe-household products, or a new habit, then I've succeeded.

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